SELF PERCEPTION AND RELATIONSHIPS

Relationships does more than enable us to survive. It is the way-indeed,the only way- we can learn who we are.

 Our sense of identity comes from the way we interact with other people.

* Are we smart or stupid?

* Are we attractive or ugly?

* Are we skillful or inept?

The answers to these questions don't come from looking in the mirror. We decide who we are based on how others react to us.

* Some people are most attracted to people who confirm their identity. People with relatively high self-esteem seek out others who confirm their value and, as much as possible, avoid those who treat them poorly.

Conversely, people who regard themselves as unworthy may look for relationships in which others treat them badly.

# This principle offers one explanation for why some people maintain damaging or unsuccessful relationships.

* If you view yourself as a loser,you may associate with others who will confirm that SELF-PERCEPTION.

SWEET ENDINGS,recognizes the fact that:

* relationships can change a person's identity as well as confirm it.

*  supportive relationships can transform feelings of inadequacy into self-respect, and damaging ones can lower self-esteem.

Besides helping who we are relationships provides a vital link with others and satisfy a range of our needs: 

* pleasure e.g. "because it's fun","to have a good time"

* Affection e.g. "to help others", "to let others know I care"

* Inclusion e.g. "because I need someone to talk to or be with", "because it makes me less lonely ".

* Escape e.g. "to put off doing something I should be doing".

* Relaxation e.g."because it allows me to unwind".

* Control e.g."because I want someone to do something for me", "to get something I don't have".

Whether the consequence of a mental attitude or a living condition, loneliness affects millions usually for the worse.with no one to love or to love us,we turn to smoke,drink,brood,or simply cry ourselves into earlier graves.

HOW TO LOVE MORE AND HURT LESS....FIND OUT ON OUR NEXT POST.